the Ex
Sometimes it's nice, even when you've kind of let go of something, to have feelings validated. Such an incident occurred today when one of my bosses (an attorney) returned from an arbitration. It just so happened that counsel for the other side was my old boss. When I left my previous job, old boss and I were not on good terms. We both had issues in dealing with each other and quite candidly, I am perpetually late. Old boss was constantly threatening to fire me. Old boss was himself perpetually disorganized and late, and liked to make it his assistants' responsibility that he get to appointments and meetings on time, though he was very snippy when we reminded him of anything. Do you see what a negative environment this creates? The fact that he had a long history of firing his legal assistants (or them walking out), and then verbally bashing them to the rest of the staff, says just a bit about old boss.
In my time with old boss I made plenty of mistakes - and still do at my current job. However, old boss had a way of taking a person's insecurities, trampling upon them, and making everything that person's fault. Like the day I turned over a new leaf and decided to be at work on time, come hell or high water. In a mad rush to get to the timeclock, I accidentally set off the alarm and security arrived before I could cancel the false alarm. Our office was charged a $50 fee because this is standard after 4 false alarms the same year. Old boss was very angry at me for this charge. Keep in mind, this happened once in the year I was there. I do not know who tripped the alarm all those other times, but for some reason I was to blame and old boss stayed mad about this for some time. I felt angry, defensive, and stupid because old boss just had that tendency to bring out the best in people. Old boss said I was passive aggressive at him in being late. I think old boss should know better than to psychoanalyze habits that have been with me long before I began working for him. These are just examples of the petty, arrogant, ego-driven ways of old boss.
Not to mention filing all complaints at the last possible second, then demanding important documents be drafted ASAP. And asking me to fax things while hovering over my shoulder - as if he's too good to send a fax, and what is the sense of both of us being at the fax machine? And being next to the trash can, handing me a discarded paper and asking me to throw it away. Due to ridiculously low self-esteem, I endured this crap because I wasn't a perfect employee, after all, and deserved no better. And left feeling incapable of having a positive work experience ever again because I was so incompetent. Fortunately attorneys I have worked for ever since leaving old boss(almost two years ago) have proven to be highly supportive and respectful their employees. Though I am still perpetually late - ugh.
That should be ample background info. Fast-forward a couple years to ... today. Current boss just came in from an arbitration – the opposing party was (you guessed correctly) old boss. I asked current boss how it went, and to say he was irritated would be an understatement. He said old boss had not submitted all documents necessary for the proceeding – it’s customary for attorneys to have to show opposing counsel what they will be using as evidence, arguments, etc. beforehand. As a result, current boss did not have adequate notice to prepare and somehow old boss found a way to still use the materials in the case.
Current boss never curses in the office, but I have heard the word "ass" come out of his mouth several times when describing old boss. Like 4-5 times in the last few minutes since he got back. I wish he had not been forced to endure the presence of old boss, but sometimes it's nice to have that validation that old boss is indeed an ass, and I was not a nutcase for feeling that way.
I think it's time for old boss to wake up and smell the coffee (which he prefers brought to him, black, no sugar). He should be held to the same high standards to which he holds everyone else. And he should stop being an ass!
In my time with old boss I made plenty of mistakes - and still do at my current job. However, old boss had a way of taking a person's insecurities, trampling upon them, and making everything that person's fault. Like the day I turned over a new leaf and decided to be at work on time, come hell or high water. In a mad rush to get to the timeclock, I accidentally set off the alarm and security arrived before I could cancel the false alarm. Our office was charged a $50 fee because this is standard after 4 false alarms the same year. Old boss was very angry at me for this charge. Keep in mind, this happened once in the year I was there. I do not know who tripped the alarm all those other times, but for some reason I was to blame and old boss stayed mad about this for some time. I felt angry, defensive, and stupid because old boss just had that tendency to bring out the best in people. Old boss said I was passive aggressive at him in being late. I think old boss should know better than to psychoanalyze habits that have been with me long before I began working for him. These are just examples of the petty, arrogant, ego-driven ways of old boss.
Not to mention filing all complaints at the last possible second, then demanding important documents be drafted ASAP. And asking me to fax things while hovering over my shoulder - as if he's too good to send a fax, and what is the sense of both of us being at the fax machine? And being next to the trash can, handing me a discarded paper and asking me to throw it away. Due to ridiculously low self-esteem, I endured this crap because I wasn't a perfect employee, after all, and deserved no better. And left feeling incapable of having a positive work experience ever again because I was so incompetent. Fortunately attorneys I have worked for ever since leaving old boss(almost two years ago) have proven to be highly supportive and respectful their employees. Though I am still perpetually late - ugh.
That should be ample background info. Fast-forward a couple years to ... today. Current boss just came in from an arbitration – the opposing party was (you guessed correctly) old boss. I asked current boss how it went, and to say he was irritated would be an understatement. He said old boss had not submitted all documents necessary for the proceeding – it’s customary for attorneys to have to show opposing counsel what they will be using as evidence, arguments, etc. beforehand. As a result, current boss did not have adequate notice to prepare and somehow old boss found a way to still use the materials in the case.
Current boss never curses in the office, but I have heard the word "ass" come out of his mouth several times when describing old boss. Like 4-5 times in the last few minutes since he got back. I wish he had not been forced to endure the presence of old boss, but sometimes it's nice to have that validation that old boss is indeed an ass, and I was not a nutcase for feeling that way.
I think it's time for old boss to wake up and smell the coffee (which he prefers brought to him, black, no sugar). He should be held to the same high standards to which he holds everyone else. And he should stop being an ass!
posted by Puggyspice at 12:21 PM
1 Comments:
Ugh. Your old boss sounds just like my former manager at my last job. No one in the place can say for sure what exactly she does to earn her own pay ... but she micro-manages everyone to death and is verbally cruel to everyone around her. Several people left the jobs they absolutely loved JUST because of an incident with her. A few short months before I left this job, I told someone working there "Finally I have found a job where I feel I will be here till retirement, I love it here."
It's such a shame that people like her and your old boss get to run the show and never be held accountable. I'm SO glad your current boss recognized him for his "assness." There. I've invented a word for today.
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