Sorry I've been so quiet this week. A couple days ago, Dice (neighbor's dog who I THOUGHT was my friend) tried to have his way with me.
Anyway, it was quite traumatic. I just don't know what to think. Dice seemed like a trustworthy pup, and I thought we were friends. But this was just WRONG. Wrong, I tell you. I'm all for healthy sexual expression (Mama's leg is a perfect example). But... DUDE, I'm a ladies man! Irresistably cute, yes. However, that is not an invitation to make me into a special kind of toy.
Sorry, Dice. Dad says we can't be friends anymore. He saw the whole thing and is gonna need therapy to get over it.